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 The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session

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Ubu
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PostSubject: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 10:46 am

Hear Ye, Hear Ye,

The Supreme Court of None Such is now in session.

Know all men by these presents, that

Whereas, your honorable Jester of the Court, Ubu the Great, having convened this court to decide the case of “Gus Vs. Cage”, a complaint of undue influence upon the person of the plaintiff by the defendant.

This court having heard the testimony, as follows:

From the plaintiff:

A.) Somebody come make Cage the Elephant behave.

B.) He tried his darnedest to influence me. He would have been successful If I didn't get so influenced the night before!

C.) OK, I had to lay back down for a bit, head was swimming and back was hurting too much to work, but am back
up now and ready to greet the day. Have a lot to do since I haven't bought all my license this year.

D.) Now wait a minute here! You all know that unclegus tells only the truth!

E.) exactly! now you know who must be lieing.

From the Defendant:

A.) By the way, Gus lies! I have been on my best behavior, as always!

B.) As to Uncle Gus and his "rumors"...well, It is, after alle , Gus.LOL

C.) Anyway, I hope someone woke Gus this morning...he really needs to go to work.


This court, having heard the testimony of the parties, is of the opinion that,

Whereas, by the testimony of the plaintiff, it appears that the plaintiff did knowingly and willingly invite the defendant upon the premises (pursuant to paragraph “B” of the plaintiff's testimony) and,

Whereas, by the testimony of the plaintiff, plaintiff did indicate that his previous inclination were of a nature to comply with the requests of the defendant (pursuant to paragraph “B” of the plaintiff's testimony) and,

Whereas, by the testimony of the plaintiff, the plaintiff did knowingly and willingly engage in the requests of the defendant (paragraph “C” of the plaintiff's testimony), and

Whereas, this court having previous associations with the defendant and, it being a matter of public record, that the defendant has shown a great reluctance, time and time again, to “share”, and

Whereas, by the testimony of the plaintiff, defendant did deviate from his prior nature and showed "good will" upon the nature of the plaintiff (paragraph “B” of the plaintiff's testimony) and,

Whereas, by the testimony of the defendant, the defendant having shown great concern for the plaintiff (paragraph “C” of the defendant's testimony), and

Whereas, it does appear that the defendant did show just and due cause for the refutation of the plaintiff's testimony, then

Therefore, this court taking into account the last statement made by the defendant before this court

“You are not very bright...right? ,

this court does find for the plaintiff in whole, and taxes the costs of these proceedings to the defendant.

Accordingly, this court does authorize the detainment of Mrs. Cage and the confiscation of any and all rum in her possession, and directs that same be delivered to this court to be distributed accordingly, to the members then in attendance, pursuant to Rule IV, Subsection “C”, Paragraph “A” of the By-Laws of the Supreme Court of Nonesuch.

farao farao farao
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unclegus
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 10:54 am

I'm just glad we didn't have to get the Shariff in on this!

Furthermore, I would like to ask the question, Why can't the defendant come by and try to influence me
when I want it?

Now, the defendant say's he is out of said rum and wants me to drive him to the bootlegger to fulfill his addiction.
I think there should be some kind of punitive damages considered!
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:03 am

And I have one more motion for this court sir!

This defendant knows good and well that I prefer good Tennessee sipping whisky over that cheap imported rum!
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:09 am

We would like to petition the court of appeals to hear this case. It is our contention that the plaintiff did willfully and knowingly participate in the behavior in question.. We also beg the court to consider the the defamation of our clients character and relieve him the burden of damages and costs. My client has suffered undue stress and suffering, and is due compensation of punitive damages and the cost of one half a bottle of rum. We pray the court grant relief in this matter.
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:22 am

Your Honor, The plaintive is requesting additional time so as to bring his own character witnesses to this court to wholly justify the
reasoning for the complaints involved in this case.

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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:43 am

Bluetick wrote:
We would like to petition the court of appeals to hear this case. It is our contention that the plaintiff did willfully and knowingly participate in the behavior in question.. We also beg the court to consider the the defamation of our clients character and relieve him the burden of damages and costs. My client has suffered undue stress and suffering, and is due compensation of punitive damages and the cost of one half a bottle of rum. We pray the court grant relief in this matter.


This court, having heard the petition for appeal, submitted by counsel of the defendant, and having examined the testimony offered therein, does hereby render as follows:

A.) as to the matter of plaintiff willing and knowingly participation.

The court did find evidence supporting said claim and does acknowledge same as a factual statement. Counsel is instructed accordingly.

B.) as to the matter defamation of our clients character

The court does find that the defendant did deviate from his normal behavior by offering to the plaintiff to partake of his treasured rum. While most parties would content that the behavior of the defendant was, if not honorable, was of such a manner that it would be found to be in good harmonious spirit of, and for, mankind, this court does acknowledge the reluctance of the defendant to become known as someone willing to liberally share in his good fortunes, and may constitute a defamation of the defendants character as afforded by the reasoning, or lack thereof, of the defendant. This court has taken said matter into deepest consideration,

HOWEVER,

Counsel for the defendant does not address, nor attempt to explain, the statement of the defendant for which is the underlying basis for the justification of this court's ruling, to-wit: “You are not very bright...right? , then

Therefore, this court finds the petition of the defendant to be without merit and the decision of the court stands.

farao farao farao



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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:47 am

unclegus wrote:
And I have one more motion for this court sir!

This defendant knows good and well that I prefer good Tennessee sipping whisky over that cheap imported rum!

Motion Denied. The court having ruled in the plaintiff's favor. This motion is without merit and was not a matter of consideration of the complaint.

The court does acknowledge the fine taste shown by the plaintiff.

farao
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:52 am

Counsel asks that your honor find me in contempt of court, because that is exactly what I have. Your close minded approach to justice has contributed to the further demise of my clients mental well being. He is being penalized for trying to better his character and become a more accepted member of his community.
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:55 am

Opposing counsel acknowledges the plaintiffs unquestionable good taste.
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:56 am

unclegus wrote:
Your Honor, The plaintive is requesting additional time so as to bring his own character witnesses to this court to wholly justify the
reasoning for the complaints involved in this case.


Motion Denied. Again, the court having rendered a verdict in favor of the plaintiff. The court, accordingly, does find that the continual motions filed by the plaintiff does constitute contempt.

Accordingly, the plaintiff is held in contempt of this court and is assessed as follows:

Plaintiff will obtain a bottle of the finest Tennessee bourbon.
Plaintiff will obtain six slabs of the finest Alabama ribs.
Plaintiff will cause said ribs to be grilled in accordance with plaintiff's standards.
Plaintiff will then render the above to the Jester of this Court and to counsel for the defendant.
Plaintiff character witnesses may then address this court in the manner to which they are acoustume, by ascending to the tables and engaging in the gyrations of their normal nature.

farao farao
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 11:59 am

Bluetick wrote:
Counsel asks that your honor find me in contempt of court, because that is exactly what I have. Your close minded approach to justice has contributed to the further demise of my clients mental well being. He is being penalized for trying to better his character and become a more accepted member of his community.

Counsel is instructed to read the last ruling of this court. The court, being most gracious, will allow counsel to reconsider his motion and withdraw same, if so inclined. Whistle

farao farao
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:02 pm

Thanks you sir. I rest my ribs.

Does the court wish for these ribs to wet or dry?

Will the defendant be sharing these ribs with the court?
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:06 pm

Plaintiff is encouraged to read the ruling again, and note that the defendant was NOT a party to the following:

A.) Tennessee Bourbon
B.) 6 slabs of rib (3 wet, 3 dry)
C.) Table dancing character witnesses

Only plaintiff and officers of this fine court are accorded the provisions of this ruling.

farao farao
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:15 pm

HaHa! naner naner boo boo Cage don't get none! bounce
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:27 pm

I, Being of sound mind, and a lifetime participant in the ongoings of the Sons, Descendants, Associates, and Cronies of the Southern Man doth give testimony to the contrary of the findings of the Court Jester.
I strongly object to the judgement, so blatantly bestowed upon me, by an obviously biased Judge.
Should anyone consider obeying a judgement ruled and decreed by a person otherwise known as an "Ubu"?
Even the most liberal, or backwards, Gov'ment entity in this Great Nation would have a problem with that .
Ubu? Really?

Forthwith, I would like to enter testimony, sworn of course, to the actual events of Sunday, January 29th, in the year of our Lord 2012.

Upon transmission of said intentions, by satellite phone, the Defendant was granted Security Clearance by said Plaintiff..."Gus" to visit the ACMan compound.
Upon arrival, Defendant proceeded to ascend a clearly hazardous treadway to access Plaintiffs abode. Upon knocking on Plaintiffs entrance portal, Defendant was greeted by a muffled, incoherent response from said Plaintiff. Defendant took this to mean "Enter...or Come In".

Upon entering, the Defendant witnessed the Plaintiff in a clearly defined "disheveled" state.

From the Plaintiffs appearance, the Defendant assumed that "Poor Gus" had been mugged by a rogue band of Wisconsin Midgets, cocaine fueled, who had left him in his sorry state. Gus had obviously been violated. Both eyes had been maced, as they were still red and irritated. Plaintiff deducted that Gus had been treated to electrical shock torture, as every hair on his head and face was awry. To add insult to injury, said Midgets had dressed him in wrinkled, smelly, non-matching attire.

Taking pity, as the Defendant is a kind hearted soul, Defendant offered Plaintiff a comforting distraction from his plight and misery, in the form of liquid medication. The Plaintiff declined the rehabilitation offered. It was nothing but good intentions offered by the Defendant.

Seeing that the offering of assistance was futile, the Defendant had to once again brave the booby trapped treadway, on which he thinks he pulled a muscle, and leave said Plaintiff to blankly stare at the monitor of his entertainment device.

Said Defendant hereby asks to be relieved of any liability, and requests an award of $32.97 for having been exposed to such mental anguish.

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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:29 pm

Geez. I go to the grocery and you guys have a whole trial!! Well, I have a ruling for you all. Very Happy

You are all summarily convicted of something and ordered to be hauled off to the hoosegow to be held until further notice. You shall be fed grits and dry toast and only allowed to drink water until you all confess your crimes and suitably convince all the females on this board that you are safe for release among unsuspecting citizenry!!! Whistle Hmph
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:33 pm

Oh, and I shall confiscate all your alkie-hol and distribute it among all the females here who so desire it Very Happy
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:38 pm

Synchronicity wrote:
Geez. I go to the grocery and you guys have a whole trial!! Well, I have a ruling for you all. Very Happy

You are all summarily convicted of something and ordered to be hauled off to the hoosegow to be held until further notice. You shall be fed grits and dry toast and only allowed to drink water until you all confess your crimes and suitably convince all the females on this board that you are safe for release among unsuspecting citizenry!!! Whistle Hmph

Order Order......this court will have order......One more such outburst from the gallery and I shall be forced to take action.

farao farao
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:40 pm

Synchronicity wrote:
Oh, and I shall confiscate all your alkie-hol and distribute it among all the females here who so desire it Very Happy

Contempt of Court! Contempt of Court!

gentlemen of this court, I invite you to chambers were we shall hide , huh contemplate the seriousness of this charge.....

farao farao
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:43 pm

Ubu wrote:
Synchronicity wrote:
Geez. I go to the grocery and you guys have a whole trial!! Well, I have a ruling for you all. Very Happy

You are all summarily convicted of something and ordered to be hauled off to the hoosegow to be held until further notice. You shall be fed grits and dry toast and only allowed to drink water until you all confess your crimes and suitably convince all the females on this board that you are safe for release among unsuspecting citizenry!!! Whistle Hmph

Order Order......this court will have order......One more such outburst from the gallery and I shall be forced to take action.

farao farao

Tongue3 Tongue3 Tongue3
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:44 pm

Ubu wrote:
Synchronicity wrote:
Oh, and I shall confiscate all your alkie-hol and distribute it among all the females here who so desire it Very Happy

Contempt of Court! Contempt of Court!

gentlemen of this court, I invite you to chambers were we shall hide , huh contemplate the seriousness of this charge.....

farao farao

Yeah, good plan Clap You'll be easier to round up that way Cuppa
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:45 pm

Synchronicity wrote:
Oh, and I shall confiscate all your alkie-hol and distribute it among all the females here who so desire it Very Happy

You have NO jurisdiction here, Wench!

Go hang out some clothes! Giggle

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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:46 pm

Your honor, I ask that your throw the testimony of the defendant out! He is praying for the help of the pygmies in New Guinea.
Further more, he made the statement that he plans to leave town and move to Montana. The Wisconsin thing is only a ploy to throw the court off target.
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:51 pm

unclegus wrote:
Your honor, I ask that your throw the testimony of the defendant out! He is praying for the help of the pygmies in New Guinea.
Further more, he made the statement that he plans to leave town and move to Montana. The Wisconsin thing is only a ploy to throw the court off target.

There you have it, Your Honor. Evidence of the Plaintiffs deteriorated mental state. I NEVER stated I was "moving to Montana". The correct phrase was, as I recall,
"Grooving in Alabama"

The Midgets must have really done a job on the Plaintiff!
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PostSubject: Re: The Supreme Court of Nonesuch is now in Session   Tue Jan 31, 2012 12:58 pm

cage the elephant wrote:
I, Being of sound mind, and a lifetime participant in the ongoings of the Sons, Descendants, Associates, and Cronies of the Southern Man doth give testimony to the contrary of the findings of the Court Jester.
I strongly object to the judgement, so blatantly bestowed upon me, by an obviously biased Judge.
Should anyone consider obeying a judgement ruled and decreed by a person otherwise known as an "Ubu"?
Even the most liberal, or backwards, Gov'ment entity in this Great Nation would have a problem with that .
Ubu? Really?

Forthwith, I would like to enter testimony, sworn of course, to the actual events of Sunday, January 29th, in the year of our Lord 2012.

Upon transmission of said intentions, by satellite phone, the Defendant was granted Security Clearance by said Plaintiff..."Gus" to visit the ACMan compound.
Upon arrival, Defendant proceeded to ascend a clearly hazardous treadway to access Plaintiffs abode. Upon knocking on Plaintiffs entrance portal, Defendant was greeted by a muffled, incoherent response from said Plaintiff. Defendant took this to mean "Enter...or Come In".

Upon entering, the Defendant witnessed the Plaintiff in a clearly defined "disheveled" state.

From the Plaintiffs appearance, the Defendant assumed that "Poor Gus" had been mugged by a rogue band of Wisconsin Midgets, cocaine fueled, who had left him in his sorry state. Gus had obviously been violated. Both eyes had been maced, as they were still red and irritated. Plaintiff deducted that Gus had been treated to electrical shock torture, as every hair on his head and face was awry. To add insult to injury, said Midgets had dressed him in wrinkled, smelly, non-matching attire.

Taking pity, as the Defendant is a kind hearted soul, Defendant offered Plaintiff a comforting distraction from his plight and misery, in the form of liquid medication. The Plaintiff declined the rehabilitation offered. It was nothing but good intentions offered by the Defendant.

Seeing that the offering of assistance was futile, the Defendant had to once again brave the booby trapped treadway, on which he thinks he pulled a muscle, and leave said Plaintiff to blankly stare at the monitor of his entertainment device.

Said Defendant hereby asks to be relieved of any liability, and requests an award of $32.97 for having been exposed to such mental anguish.


The court hearing this appeal of the defendant, and acknowledging the seriousness of the damages caused upon the person of the defendant, by his discovery of the plaintiff in a state of apparent fornication of and with Wisconsin midgets, and

The court weighing that damage, is of the opinion that the defendant was caused such harm that any statements made by the defendant as to the "illumination" of this court shall be stricken from the record

The matter is remanded back to trial court for further pleadings.

Further, upon the charge of Contempt. This court does hold the charge to be of such serious nature that the court does direct the one known as "frog legs" to contact the one known as Deep Fat and send one dollar to his charity for the poor orphans of Minnesota and to obtain pictures of the orphan enriched by this ruling for the review of the gentlemen of this court.......


Court is now in session. Plaintiff may introduce his character witnesses at this time.

farao farao



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